BiosFear

2004-04-10T20:16:00.000-05:00

I may or may not be coming back...

2003-09-26T11:02:00.000-05:00

MY LAST POST

A very wise leader and someone who I aspire to be more like, spoke incredible words that had a real impact on me. Well, I guess it was not necessarily the exact words, but the meaning and timing behind the words.

"IT IS FINISHED!!!" (because He knew it was time)

2003-08-01T17:43:00.000-05:00

when it rains, it pours...

Well...

I wanted to let you know that I will be out of pocket for the next week or so.
My Grandmother (who has been a mentor to me, and one of my biggest prayer warriors) graduated to heaven today. It is a really weird feeling to be sad and excited at the same time. I will miss her greatly - yet I must admit I am a little jealous of where she is and who she is partying with right now.

Kristina and I will be driving to Florida tonight and hope to be with the rest of my family by this time tomorrow.

Please keep us in your prayers.
1. That we would get there safely - and that I won't fall asleep (we're driving).
2. That Kristina will be able to rest and will not have any complications from her recent surgery while we travel.
3. That God would use this time to draw others to himself.

I will miss you guys - We love you guys!
Bob & Kristina out...

final thought...
This has been a real reminder to me of how important it is to make every "good-bye" count. You never think that when you just run out to the grocery store it could have been your last chance to say how you feel. I am thankful that the last words I spoke to my grandmother last night were, "Grandma - I love you very, very much - good night".

2003-07-24T21:11:00.000-05:00

We are home now!!!
Kristina is doing great.
She is so awesome.

I've spent the last 2 nights on a cot by her feet. I never thought I could miss someone who was in the same room. I am looking forward to being able to hold my wife again tonight.
Please continue to pray for her, and for her rapid recovery. My prayer is that God would also use this time to build her up, encourage her, and hold her in his loving arms.
I also pray that He would use the next 6 weeks to give us some of our life back - pray for lots of snuggle time.

Thanks again for all your prayers. Some people have asked for our address to send her cards and stuff so...
Kristina Carlton
1310 Radam Circle
Austin, TX 78745

Good night all
Bob out...

2003-07-23T18:12:00.000-05:00

well...
Kristina began running a fever today so she will not be coming home yet.
One more night in the KRANKENHAUSE (german for hospital).
She is feeling great though.
We walked around the hospital today for about 15 minutes. Hopefully she will be able to come home tomorrow AM. I am headed back there as soon as I feed the doggies.
Goodnight everyone!
Peace...

2003-07-22T22:37:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone -
Thanks so much for all your support, prayers, and encouragement.
I just left Kristina's side to come home, feed the dogs, give you all an update, take a shower, and head back. They are going to let me spend the night with her.

God is Good!!!

Surgery was a complete and total success.
Everything was perfect, and our best case scenario (being able to keep one ovary) was God's best scenario as well.
Kristina is recovering well.
Hardly any pain up until about 9:00 tonight. Nurse gave her some pain meds that she had a pretty harsh reaction to, but she is feeling better now - and sleeping quite well.

I am heading back there now.
Thanks again for all your calls, prayers, flowers, cards, gifts, and love. She sends you all her love and I send you my warmest thanks.

Did I mention that God is good?!

Peace -
Bob out...

2003-07-22T04:53:00.000-05:00

Here is the info on Kristina's surgery.

As most of you know Kristina has been sick for over a year now.
I don't know about you, but I cannot handle it when I have a cold more than three days - I can't imagine having pain every single day (I'm such a wimp). The doctor assures us that this procedure (Total Hysterectomy) will be the end to her suffering.
Her being able to have a life - a normal one - enjoyable and painfree - is our #1 goal. We are looking forward to starting over. We wonder what our first year of marriage would have been like if things were different. The truth is - I wouldn't trade a minute of it for anything! I am so blessed!

I'm sure most of you know this as well, but this procedure will make us unable to have kids - naturally.
As you can imagine, the reality of us not being able to have our own children is pretty devastating to us both.

Her surgery will take place at The Women's Center located within the Round Rock Medical Center (on FM 620 in Round Rock Texas).
She goes in at 6am - surgery will start at 7:30. It should take 2 - 3 hours.

She may be up for visitors later in the evening, but asks for privacy until she has been stabilized in her room for a while after surgery.
You are more than welcome to come pace the floor with me during her surgery, but after they send her to the room - she asks that you hold off.
Call me ahead of time if you are thinking of coming and I can let you know if she is up for seeing people - room #'s and all that stuff.

My cell # is 512.771.4406

Please pray for her.
We believe wholeheartedly in the power of God's people coming before Him, interceding for one another.
We are praying for His will in this surgery - no matter what that means. We believe that He is God and we are not - so that means He is in charge - we will go with Him.

Peace to all of you -
************The preceding was an email i sent out last night****************

We are now on out way to the hospital - aka the Castle where the Princess will be staying for a couple of days.
I will update as soon as I can get connected. Thank you for all your prayers and support.

2003-07-17T21:40:00.000-05:00

Spent the day in meetings - good ones.

Been thinking about how cool it was to hang out late last night with Josh - "seeing visions and dreaming dreams".
Had a great morning with God, my wife, and the Rudd family. Nothing like a hot cup of coffe and people that I love to share it with.
Kristina and I are hanging out tonight - reflecting on the days events - thinking about the future - playing with the dogs. Interviewing for a job - Mourning a major loss - celebrating a great hope for a new life.

Our lives are about to radically change - 4 days and a wakeup.
I look forward to pampering her for the next six weeks while she recovers. Must treat her like the princess that she is. I am so blessed.

Thank you God - Your mercy, grace, and blessings are new everyday. Alleluia!
I don't deserve your love, but you give it anyway.

Mind mind is wandering, or should I say "journey"ing, to those in Sheffeild and those on their way.
I pray that today - God would surprise you.
I pray for you who need to cry and be held by your Father.
hmmnn...
Peace...

God - heal my wife - please - we need you. She means so much to me - I know she means more to You. I trust her to You. I lift her to You - for you are the only one who can heal her body. Let my wife live - really live! - whatever that means to You. I trust you.

2003-07-17T06:50:00.000-05:00

So far it has been a really great week...

Monday night I went to a bar and church broke out.
I have been hanging out at a new place (Waterloo) and praying for the people there and getting to know the regulars and the staff. What I didn't know is that God has been hanging out there much longer than me. Don't worry - I still go to Spiderhouse - notice I said Monday - Spiderhouse is Tuesday night.
In one night I met 5 new people, communed with them over wings and the coldest tap brew in town, and then we commited to one another to meet every monday night for purposes of exploring our faith.
On a side rant...
I had someone (actually a large group of christian leaders)recently try to argue with me saying it is not *church* unless you meet with a group of christians (of course their method of proof was a passage in the bible that was twisted by adding their own opinions to it [a big "no-no" according to God]).
Let me just say I think that is total BS. In one night at Waterloo - the 9 of us at that table had more *church* than I experienced in a 2 year period at the "biggest and best church in the world". Those of us at that table (and the three other tables that eventually joined us) experienced God in a real and life-altering way. "Real" and "Life-Altering" are typically two missing key components in *church*.

anyway...

Tuesday morning I had coffe with one of my guys who told me about a similar experience he had on Saturday at a book signing. While standing in line he...
met a guy
got to know the guy
earned the trust of the guy
and will now be hanging out with the guy (and his 5 other friends) every week. Maybe they will talk baseball, maybe life, or maybe even God. Pray for Gary and his new *church*.

Wednesday was a good day too!
Met Josh, Kristen, and Judah for lunch. Went to hangout/learn/pray with other likeminded community leaders in the afternoon. Spent my evening with some of my closest peeps my beautiful wife, my buddy Keri, and my other buddy John (not a blogger).
Later, The Rudds showed up(they were staying with us). Our dogs tried to make them feel welcome by crashing in on them in the middle of the night.

Today is a great day so far.
I awoke at 5:30 - joined My Sexy Schnookems and Kristen(Josh's Sexy Schnookems) for coffee, took the dogs into my office and we are now talking to you...

Good Morning!

2003-07-11T16:03:00.000-05:00

for Judah

2003-07-09T17:36:00.000-05:00

as promised, I am once again, back in the world of BLAHG.
I realize it has been over a month since my last entry - I am sure most have stopped checking.

Oh my poor little little blog - how I have missed you.
I was affraid of you so I ran away.
Actually that is not true - it was not you that is was fearful of, but it was another.
Can you forgive me for letting *him* get in the way of our relationship?
I am strong now - and in spite of *him* - I am going to blog.

Tonight I will be enjoying a meal at God's table with some of my closest peeps.
I wish you were all going to be here to join us.

I am missing my peeps over seas on faith journeys and those that are wabiSABI'in it up without us.
I love and miss you guys - God be with you.

2003-05-06T17:28:00.000-05:00

I am headed to Spider House in a couple of hours. I am praying that God will open up more doors(to people's hearts) there.
It is a place that is spiritually ripe and emotionally desperate. Please pray with me that God will let His glory fall on that place.
Please also pray that He will lead us to the right people to build fires into and with.
Have a great night everyone!

2003-05-06T17:13:00.000-05:00

well Nathan - so you have tabs... big deal...
can your mac do this?

Let's see mac try to top that - oh wait... why the heck would they?
What is this world coming to?
Stop this thing - I want to get off!

Obvious missed marketing joke - I will catch it before they do - You are all my witness (c) 2003 Bob Carlton - Festival "Go"-ers in Britian will be able to try this out by the summer.

2003-05-02T11:09:00.000-05:00

Little Bump has left the warm comfort of home and was transformed like a butterfly into Mary Judah at 3:45 am today.

Glory to God in Heaven above!
Congratulations Kristen and Joshua!!!

2003-05-02T09:07:00.000-05:00

Kristen went into labor today!
Let's be praying for her, little bump, and anxious daddy!
Love you guys!!!

2003-04-30T12:58:00.000-05:00

The boys are putting the band back together for some USO shows!
How cool is that? Makes me want pull out my makeup kit.
ROCK ON!!!

2003-04-29T23:06:00.000-05:00

Tonight was a good night...
Met with a friend for coffee and talked about God, life, and the pursuit of hapiness - even when there is bad crap in the midst of it.
Drove around - felt led to pray for said friend, and the clubs, people, shop owners, etc in my hood. South Congress is on my heart big time. Several times in the past month I have felt God urging me to pray and worship on behalf of my neighborhood.
Hands lifted high - knee driving - singing at the top of my lungs - "oh God let us be, a generation that seeks, seeks your face oh God of Jacob"

time to go night-night, but too much caffine...

So Kristina blogged about the bathroom thing today.
Everyone seems to think it is funny that we have seperate bathrooms.
Some judge and say that we must not be able to be "truly intimate" in our relationship.
I believe that having seperate bathrooms is what allows us to remain "truly intimate". Some things are better left unseen - or unheard!
This is what works for us, I realize that every couple is different.
As far as I am concerned, Kristina has never farted in her life. I love that about her.
Ignorance is bliss!

2003-04-29T22:34:00.000-05:00

Check out my new friend Theresa's blog, who says "God is like chocolate"

2003-04-29T18:46:00.000-05:00

This is the future of THE CATALYST

2003-04-29T16:00:00.000-05:00

Lot's of good stuff is a brew.
Kristina: Meeting with the nutritionist in Kerrville went really well. We both feel a great sense of peace and relief about it. He believes he has a handle on her situation and is treating her accordingly. We have had a good couple of weeks and I am hopeful of the future. She is so special to me. I hate to see her in pain (physically or emotionally). My hope is that she will soon be feeling better and enjoying life to new degrees.
Isn't it amazing how when someone you love is hurting - it causes you to hurt as well? I consider it a gift from God to be able to feel this way. I pray that it is because God is allowing me to bear some of the burden and sparing her from receiving it all. I wish I could just take it all.

I am currently exploring what it would look like to see God in the ordinary, everyday life activities...
waking up, brushing my teeth, driving, eating, playing with the dogs, holding my wife, using the computer, etc.
I am trying to see what it would look like to "do it all" in Jesus' name.
"Whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him" Colossians 3:17

2003-04-29T15:40:00.000-05:00

Well... I guess this is the real me?

You are a MiniMoog
-Everyone wants you
-You are very popular
-You have a vintage look and unique personality
-You are loved by indie rockers the world over
-You are a leader and always get the melody

what synthesizer are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-04-12T10:13:00.000-05:00

We are almost set to go!
Got our toes, eyebrows, and fingernails done yesterday. Finishing final packing today.

As of tomorrow morning we will be out of here.
I hope you all have a wonderful week.

Much praise to God:
Kristina is having one of her best days yet. She has not felt this good in quite a while. I can't imagine what it must be like for her to experience so much pain, day after day after day. Thank you God for givng her this day - I am praying that this will be a pain-free, stress-free, much needed rest for her.

Our friend Chris will be house/dog sitting while we are gone. I hope the dogs are good for him while he is here. I hope they don't treat him like a substitute teacher.

I'm off to clean the pool before we go. If you guys are good, maybe we will bring you back a souvenir.

2003-04-09T11:02:00.000-05:00

I had to catch the news today - perfect timing I suppose.
This is what I witnessed happening live...

They are comparing this to the destruction of the Berlin Wall.

2003-04-08T08:56:00.000-05:00

Took down the picture of the puppy - takes too long for most people to load.
I thought I would show everyone that I actually have a warm and cuddly side.

Exactly 5 days from now, Kristina and I will be well on our way to board a ship for the Caribbean Islands. I am very excited! It has been a year since we have been able to get away from the stress and busyness. I can hardly believe it has been a year since we were married. It feels like only a couple of weeks. I have been blessed with the best wife in the whole world. I don't know where I would be if she were not by my side. Thank you God!

I am now off to the dentist - gotta get a cleaning before the trip - I hate going to the dentist. Now that I am grown up, when I am finished, they no longer ask me if I want to go see what is in the "treasure chest" for me. What's up with that?

2003-04-04T00:34:00.000-06:00

Had a good rehearsal tonight with my relatively new friend Nathan (link on left). He showed me the trick to putting up pictures. Thanks Bro!
It is great to hang out and play with real musicians again. I am realizing just how unchallenged I have been and how rusty it has made me.

Kristina was able to go hang out with other new ECN friends tonight. I really missed her. Why am I blogging? I should go crawl into bed with her and our crazy dogs! Bye!

2003-04-03T17:57:00.000-06:00

Well, It has been EXACTLY one month since my last blog. How pathetic is that? I promised Theresa from Spider House I would post ASAP so here goes...

Over the last month I have felt myself being thrown about to and fro (no fro - too bald).
Between working on the Catalyst, doing cultural assessments, going to conferences, and just this last week co-laboring with and for wabiSABI, I think I have met the threshold of business i.e.: stress. So much so that I find my time WITH God lessening, and time working FOR God increasing. After realizing this to be true - I committed to God to SLOW DOWN. I think God wants me to spend more time at his feet, than running about trying to get His work done. I realize He doesn't need me to do His work. It is my job to be available to Him. I can't be available if I am too busy saying, "hang on a sec God, I'm trying to do some kingdom work here".

Kristina and I are going to take a much-needed vacation - wahoo!
What could be better than sitting on the beach in Belize, snorkeling, drinking fruffy umbrella drinks, basking in the wonder of God's creations?

The plan:
Sunday April 13th - get on a big ship in Galveston - Rhapsody of the Seas
Spend the next 7 days floating around to Key West, Belize and Cozumel.
Come home on the 20th - well rested, relaxed, restored, rejuvenated, recreated (and any other appropriate "re" you can think of - hopefully not "re"tarded)

I have to start packing - I'm a planner you know - just ask Kristina.
Lots of SPF 45 for my large bald sun magnet.

I promise I will start blogging again -thanks everyone who has been yelling at me about it.

I hope to have some decompression time in regards to wabiSABI - I will let you know what I come up with.

Peace

2003-03-03T16:26:00.000-06:00

Considering a new religion?
May I make a suggestion?
WWSBD?

2003-02-28T22:55:00.000-06:00

Best part of the evening - being with my "gift from heaven".

2003-02-28T22:52:00.000-06:00

DareDevil - ummm well...
Entertaining > yes
Special FX > lots
Realistic FX > no (can you say Spider Man?)
Plot > C-
Worth renting > yes
Worth $8 > no
Over all score (out of 5) 3.25

The extra .25 is for trying so damn hard to set up for the sequel - total of 5 times - not kidding. It actually was quite amusing by the third time it happened.
Then if that wasn't enough - there was an additional scene at the end of the credits that basically just said, "come back in a year and we'll show you the rest of the story" It was THAT blatant.
What can I expect for a movie that is designed to apeal the the mass of pop-culture? Baaah, Baaaah (my sheep impersonation)

2003-02-28T17:38:00.000-06:00

I had lunch today with an old friend and a new friend. It amazes me the tapestry that God is weaving in this city. Never in my life have I run into so many like minded leaders. Something is stirring. God is up to something big.

My lovely wife and I are off to date night. Against my better judgement and initial hunches - we are going to go see Dare Devil.
I will fill you in on the details later... (not about our date - just about the movie).

2003-02-27T12:09:00.000-06:00

Thanks Fred, you were so much more than a friend

2003-02-27T09:35:00.000-06:00

My hero has gone on to a better neighborhood
We will miss you Fred, and thank you for taking such good care of us.

2003-02-26T16:44:00.000-06:00

to my peeps...
don't be fooled by the blogs that I got
I'm still... I'm still Bobby from the block
used to shave a little now I shave a lot
I'm still... I'm still Bobby from the block

Shizzel my Nizzel, Yo

I'm off to CORE - Peace

2003-02-25T11:50:00.000-06:00

I stayed up last night and watched the snow and reminisced, as our yard was magically transformed into a soft white blanket, of days gone by back in Chicago. It was fun to watch our dogs treading oh so carefully onto this strange cold white stuff.

Like most Austinites, Kristina was given the day off. It is great to have another day together. She has decided to dedicate the day to building a database for the catalyst (a project she has been wanting to work on for some time). Of course I am a great help to her - NOT! I keep asking - "can it have a button that does this...?" I know nothing about Oracle (the program she is using). "Can you program it to turn the coffee pot on in the morning?" Oh' well...

What are you doing today? Anyone up for sledding down Mt. Bonnell? Not that we could actually drive to the top. I hope you take the time to do something fun - or something you have been wanting to do, if you had an extra day.

2003-02-20T12:44:00.000-06:00

ok... so I think I found a template that actually works. I had the whole flame thing going to match my, glasses, phone, cigarette case, favorite bowling shirt, etc.
But since I failed my nuclear physics class @ the Sally Struther's Institute of Home Learning, I can't seem to make it work right. oh well.